How Tabletop Games Teach Cooperative Competition
Competition has been under scrutiny for some time. Researchers found that “competitive conditions increased motivation and performance…in comparison to non-competitive conditions (Cagiltay, Ozcelik, & Ozcelik).”
However, there are better and worse ways to compete.
Tabletop gaming fosters personal growth and critical thinking. But a sore loser or domineering winner taints the whole experience.
People come back to a game because of the experience, not the final outcome.
Thus, tabletop gaming selects for a cooperative competitor rather than a cutthroat one.
But competition requires cooperation. A lot of cooperation.
To compete, you must first agree on the rules.
I have fond memories of tearing the shrink wrap off a game, inhaling the cardboard and paint smell, and together with my friend scouring the 20-page manuals and quickstart guide to learn how this new system worked. We were excited to learn a system by which we would attempt to best each other.
Interest in board games is an interest in systems. It’s a curiosity about how a set of rules come together to create a cohesive, enjoyable experience.
Furthermore, the competition of tabletop gaming is embedded in a greater social context. There are tournaments for the obsessed gamer, but the vast majority of tabletop gaming is buffered on either side by friendly social interaction with those against whom you’re competing.
Types of Competitiveness
Researchers have identified two types of competitiveness: hypercompetitiveness and personal development competitiveness. The former can “indicate a need to win at any cost which is associated with a fragile sense of self-worth and a host of other dysfunctional traits. In contrast, personal development competitiveness appears to be a generally healthier orientation. Those high in this competitive style are typically motivated by a desire to improve themselves and achieve personal growth. They are likely to focus more on the activity itself than the outcome of the competition.”
The environment of tabletop gaming naturally develops a preference for personal development competitiveness, as people who exhibit hypercompetitiveness, while not an issue in isolated competition, are unwelcome at a board game party.
Most kids who enjoy competition start out hypercompetitive. As soon as they understand winning and losing, they realize that winning feels a lot better, and treat each game as an isolated event where winning is their aim at all costs.
However, kids soon realize that interpersonal relationships and tabletop games are inextricably connected. If they have a tantrum over a lost game, they don’t get invited back to play.
Why Board Games Work
Video games lack social accountability. You can cuss someone out or urge them to commit an irreversible act of violence on themselves before alt-f4ing and walking outside for a breath of fresh air. There are rewards for being a socially well-adjusted person online, such as making friends or having a profile full of commendations. But unless you enter the online space with your social ethic in place, there’s no obvious reason to act in one manner over another. Companies have tried to remedy this with report/ban functions, but being an asshole to someone isn’t enough to remove you from the game.
You can always hit “Find Match.”
If you’re an asshole to the people you play board games with, the “Find Match” button will disappear.
You can’t create a new account. You can’t contact customer support asking for the ban to be revoked. Through your actions you’ve chosen to be rejected by your tribe.
There are plenty of differences between interpersonal conflict and board game competition. But there’s one key component of playing board games that I want to make crystal clear: the goal of board games is a good experience across time, not winning this game.
When you’re arguing with a partner or friend, there are things you can do to win this argument. You can bring up the past, make generalized claims about their character, or kick and scream and raise your voice.
But do you want to feel good about this argument, or the relationship as a whole? If you take each individual conflict as the endpoint, you’ll do things to “win” that you won’t do if you see the set of conflicts as something you want to cooperatively overcome with your partner.
I had the great fortune of playing tabletop games with the same friend through adolescence. We had open, honest discussions about strategies and tactics. We discussed why we enjoyed certain game mechanics over others. We acquired a collection of games and asked, “What do you feel like playing today?” Which is really saying, “Let’s mutually decide on the system or set of rules within which we’ll attempt to best each other.”
People are obsessed with gamifying learning and gamifying their life. They want their kids to be competitors that others want to compete against. Tabletop games make it fun to learn systems, math, interpersonal conflict resolution, and cooperative competition. Better yet, a game enjoyed by a ten year old can be just as fun for someone who is fifty.
Tabletop gaming is a hobby that bridges generational gaps and brings people together in collaborative pursuit of fun and personal growth.
Get playing!
